


Gone

by acatalepsy



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Angst, M/M, Minor panic attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-03 23:40:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2892386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acatalepsy/pseuds/acatalepsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charles Lincoln Neal goes missing on the 2nd of June, 2015.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gone

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I MADE THIS WHOLE THING UP. It isn’t real. Thank god.
> 
> This is my first time writing fanfiction so critiques would be the most amazing thing ever. Help a brother out.
> 
> This fic was written for ashinjapan as part of the 2014 Tumblr Rhink Gift Exchange.
> 
> Thanks so much to mythical-renee for being my beta-reader and supporting me through the many hardships of writing fanfiction, also for just generally being cool. She helped me so much you have no idea.
> 
> This fic is based off the song “The Lightning Strike” by Snow Patrol.

 

_“i want to see you_  
 _as you are now_  
 _every single day_  
 _that i am living”_

_//_

_“what if this storm ends_  
 _and i don't see you_  
 _as you are now_  
 _ever again?”_

_— The Lightning Strike - Snow Patrol_

__  
  


_There are those of us who live our lives within a finite, calculable number of days. Clinical, logical, not to say unambitious, but above all else, grounded in the present moment, maximising time to the best of our abilities._

_And then there are those who live with their eyes on the horizon. Victims of eternal somedays. They let the present pass them by, distracted by fantastic possibility, cycling through fleeting dreams, never to realise the opportunities right in front of them._

_Sometimes these people’s lives can be fraught with indecision. What is the point of efficiency without a greater purpose? Why wait for a day that will never come?_

_Other people may live without question; systematising, dreaming, dreaming, and systematising. They will follow these paths to the end, never quite where they want to be._

_And sometimes, miraculously, these people find each other. They live in equilibrium - forming a balance between idea and execution._

_Even then can miscommunications arise, obscuring not only the mundane, but also the brightest of dreams._

_These unrequited desires slip away._

__  
  
  


**For as long as Rhett could remember, Link was there. And then, on the 2nd of June, 2015, he just wasn’t.**

The day started off the same as any other. Sirens blared in the distance, heat radiated off the concrete, and the windows remained open at all times to let any semblance of a breeze in. A feeble attempt to buffer the humidity of summer in California. Rhett could remember the way Locke had woken him up that morning, jumping onto his bed and knocking the wind out of him. The way he made breakfast (eggs and bacon - al dente) and sat at the kitchen table waiting for the honk of a car’s horn that never came.

It had been Link’s idea to pick him up for work each morning. 7:00 am every single day, without fail. Rhett would tease him about always needing to arrive on time down to the minute.

That was the way the day should have started. With eye-rolls, smirks, and exasperated sighs. Not with a phone call.

Jessie had been the one to answer it.

If Rhett could pinpoint all the events that followed as the result of a single moment, it would have been the phone call. _Why did she have to pick up? Why couldn’t he have stayed in those final minutes - living the rest of his life suspended, indefinitely not-knowing?_

When a person so dominant in your life, so crucial, vanishes. Things don’t make sense. It’s impossible to imagine life without them, yet there you are. Living. Breathing. Against all odds, surviving without them by your side. The reality of the situation is inconceivable.

_Missing._

That’s what Christy had said.

Jessie remained hopeful.

_24 hours hadn’t even passed yet. It was still possible that he could just show up._

Rhett knew better. Link’s life functioned like a well-oiled machine. Everything was in its right place at the right time, folded, stamped, sealed, and colour-coordinated. If he was going somewhere he would have told Christy about it.

Rhett drove to work alone that morning.

The studio was deserted.

Link’s jacket still hung on the back of his chair, and an empty coffee cup sat on his desk, waiting to be filled. He was almost able to convince himself that it was just another day at work, that Link would suddenly appear through the doorway with a laptop under one arm and a wad of papers in the other, but the silence betrayed him.

He picked up the jacket, and slipped it on. It was baggy on Link, so it wasn’t _too_ small, but it ran a bit short on the sleeves.

Sitting at his desk, across from Link’s, the initial shock of Jessie’s words was starting to wear off and reality was setting in. A knot of guilt formed in Rhett’s stomach.

The last time he and Link had spoken, they were arguing. The dispute had ended with Link storming out of the office, slamming the door behind him.

It was all Rhett’s fault, as well. He knew he shouldn’t have even mentioned anything in the first place. He shouldn’t have asked for so much. Maybe then Link would still be sitting at the desk across from him. He wouldn't be gone.

That’s what he was. _Gone_. Link wasn’t _missing_ \- he was too smart. Smarter than Rhett, anyway - although he wouldn’t readily admit it. There had to be some sort of significance to his disappearance. Possibly related to their argument? It wasn’t like him to just leave without there being an important reason for doing so.

Whatever the rationale, Rhett knew he had to find him. They were best friends. _Brothers_.

As kids they had discussed several times what would happen if either of them ever got separated from the other; where they would go, how they would get there, what they would need to bring. After much debate they had settled on using the small clearing they discovered in the woods near where they used to live as a meeting place.

In his teenage years, many of Rhett’s classes were spent staring listlessly into space, imagining scenarios in which they would have to run away together, or what would happen if they were forced to go into hiding. He’d even gone so far as to issue out several books from the local library on wilderness survival and on how people in the army rationed food packets and located clean water.

Link had to be back at Buie’s Creek. It was the only logical explanation.

Maybe he finally realised where he was supposed to be.

  
  


 

**_19 years prior - May 11th, 1996_ **

The evening of May 11th was a balmy one. Only a few cicadas remained chirping as the two boys lay in the dry grass amidst the leaves and broken tree branches, and the sun was only then beginning to slip below the horizon.

In the weeks leading up to graduation, Rhett and Link stayed in The Clearing more often. Whether it be sentiment, or longing for the familiarity of paths well-trodden, they found themselves spending more time in the woods those final few days before they left Hornet Central.

Every afternoon as soon as school finished, the two of them would bike past the old graveyard straight to the edge of the forest. They would throw off their backpacks and spend the rest of the day wandering through the trees, talking late into the night.

Link lay with his hands behind his head, looking up at the sky as the first stars began to appear. Across the grass, Rhett lay on his side, watching him intently.

After a while, Link sighed. “I can’t believe we’re really leaving.”

His voice rung in the silence.

Rhett hummed quietly in agreement, his brow furrowed. It was true - he couldn’t believe it either. They’d been in school together for all of twelve years, and just like that it was over. They were heading to university—off on different paths. Off to live different lives.

After a moment, he spoke. “I just … I don’t want us to get separated.”

“We’re blood-brothers. If we get separated we’ll find each other.”

“I dunno, man.”

“Well ...” Link gestured as he searched for a solution. “What about our meeting place? Didn’t we agree ages ago that we’d just meet up here? In The Clearing?”

Rhett raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you reckon that’s a bit stupid now?”

Link rolled his eyes, sulking.

“Well it is!” Rhett laughed, “‘You really believe we’ll still be here when we’re, what? Thirty?”

Link huffed. “Do you have any _other_ ideas?”

Rhett thought for a bit. “No, not really.”

“Ha!” Link punched the air triumphantly. “Then we stick with _my_ plan.”

“Pssh. Whatever.”

The conversation lapsed into silence once more.

Finally Link sat up, his silhouette dark against the stars. “I meant it when I said you don’t have to worry, y’know.” He unconsciously ran a thumb over the thin white scar on the palm of his left hand.

“Hm?”

He gave Rhett a lopsided grin. “I just have a good feeling about this. I can’t explain it.”

Rhett’s expression softened as Link fell back into the grass, suddenly overcome with a rush of fondness towards him. The pinprick stars were reflected back in his eyes as he stared up into the canopy and the look of unconscious wonder on his face was mesmerising. It was as if the entire world was stretching out before him.

“I want this moment to go on forever.”

Rhett realised he had spoken aloud and watched as Link's expression shifted to one of confusion.

“Y’know, like, I think this is where I’m supposed to be. Right here,” he clarified.

“Oh. I … Same.”

The two boys lay like that for several more minutes, with the summer night-sky above them and the warm breeze sending ripples through the grass, drunk on the possibility the future held.

And for a split second, everything was perfect.

  
  
  


**_Present day - 2nd June 2015_ **

Indicating left, Rhett pulled out into the Los Angeles traffic.

He’d never been more sure of something his life.

He had to get back to North Carolina. It was the only clear objective in his mind. Everything else was irrelevant.

Passing through the vibrant streets, the city looked like a distorted imitation of its former self. Normally California felt as if it were caught in a perpetual summer, yet the sun-bleached shop windows and faded-polaroid scenery all felt artificial. Like there was something, darker, dirtier to the landscape. Everything felt wrong.

The enthusiastic street-performers that passed by looked like smiling caricatures. The families playing on the beach, the children laughing; it all felt like a mockery.

Suddenly the air in the car began to feel thin. He rolled a window down to let in the breeze, but it carried the smell of cooking food from nearby vendors and immediately made him feel sick. Clearing his throat, he gripped the steering wheel tightly, keeping his eyes fixed on the road. Eventually the feeling of nausea began to fade.

At one point he heard his phone ring, but he ignored it, letting it go to voicemail.

For several more hours he watched the road fall away before him, trying to think of nothing but his destination. Occasionally, though, something would occur to him, and he’d turn to the passenger seat to share it before realising that Link wasn’t there, that same nauseous feeling threatening to consume him once again.

As the traffic began to thin out, suburbia blurred into barren, monochromatic countryside. Shrubbery cast long shadows that slipped over each other onto the road, and Rhett rolled up the windows, the sun disappearing behind the distant mountains and leaving the landscape awash in blue.

Night fell quickly, and Rhett’s eyelids grew heavy. Eventually, he had to pull over.

Switching the ignition off, his headlights flickered out. The only light now was from the stars above. He clambered out of the car, gravel crunching under his feet, and ignored the biting cold as he sat atop the car’s hood, looking up to see a familiar sky.

These weren’t the light-polluted, faded stars of Los Angeles - this was the same sky he had shared with Link so often throughout his life. It reminded him of home.

  
  
  


**_13 years prior - August 28th, 2002_ **

“Come on, man!” Rhett clapped Link on the back. “Today’s your last day of manhood. Enjoy it!”

Rhett watched as Link tipped back the last of his second drink and looked around the room, a bemused expression on his face. From where they were seated at the bar they could see their old roommate, Greg, getting a lap-dance from a scantily clad policewoman. He flashed Link the thumbs up, who smiled back awkwardly. This whole get-together had been Greg’s idea. At least he was having a good time. Link didn’t look like he was enjoying himself at all, but Rhett put it all down to nerves. He was going to be a married man in a few days.

Link leaned into Rhett, trying to speak so he could be heard over the blaring music, “It’s just one of those facts of life, isn’t it?”

“What is?”

“That a bachelor’s party isn’t really meant for the bachelor himself, but his friends.”

Rhett laughed. “Only ‘cause you won’t stop being so timid! What is this? Third grade?”

“I mean- I wouldn’t go so far as to …” Link groaned. “That was _one_ time!”

Rhett raised his eyebrows and tilted his head down, a look of complete and utter skepticism upon his face. When they were kids, Link was notorious for being too afraid to even go within a mile of most girls. Yet another article Rhett had added to the list of things he would tease Link about over time. These days it was really ramping up.

“I’m getting _married_. Give me a break.”

“Whatever, man.” Rhett turned and gestured for the bar-tender to come over, asking for a round of shots. He was Link’s best friend - and best man. It was practically his duty to make sure Link was having a good time on his ‘final night of freedom’.

When he turned back, Link had one eyebrow raised. “Are you trying to get me drunk?”

“It - is - your - bachelor’s - party!” Rhett punctuated each word with a jab of his forefinger on the bar. “ _You’re going to have a good time!_ ”

“We should just leave. This music is giving me a headache, anyway," Link rubbed the bridge of his nose.

Rhett shook his head in disappointment. “I was hoping it wouldn’t have to come to this …”

Link blinked. “Come to wh-”

Rhett seized Link by the shoulders and shook him forcefully. “NEAL!”

He yelped. “Rhett! Wha-”

“BE A MAN!”

“I - I don’t-”

“WHO’S THE MAN?” Rhett yelled.

“I’m the - the man?” Link stuttered in a daze.

“LINK. WHO - IS - THE - MAN?” Flecks of spit were beginning to gather on his glasses.

“I’M THE MAN!” Link cringed, yelling back louder.

Rhett nodded in approval and leaned back in his seat. “We are going to do these shots.” He looked between the two drinks. “And although I know it is against your very nature today, for whatever reason, you are going to have a good time.”

“ _I am going to have a good time._ ” Link repeated as he wiped his glasses off on the sleeve of his shirt.

Rhett passed Link a shot-glass and then picked up his own. “Three … two … one.”

They both threw their heads back in union. Link’s face immediately contorted and Rhett burst out laughing.

He squeezed his eyes shut. “Gaaah. Why do people _do_ that to themselves?"

Two more drinks and another round of shots later, they left the bar, Link leaning on Rhett, his glasses askew. It usually took quite a bit to make Rhett drunk, one of the perks (and occasionally a burden) of being 6”7. Link however ...

“Howexactly ‘re we s’posed to get home?” He slurred.

Rhett hummed in amusement as they walked down the street, the occasional car passing by and illuminating them. “Let’s put it this way. I didn’t _not_ think about that.”

“What?”

“It was your bachelor’s party so I thought: ‘Hey! I should be there for my best buddy.’”

Link nodded slowly, his glasses slipping a bit further down his nose.

“So, obviously _I_ wasn’t going to be the designated driver,” he continued.

Link narrowed his eyes in suspicion.

“What I’m trying to say is … I-thought-we-could-just walk-back.” He said it quickly. “I mean - it’s only a couple of blocks.”

“ _Noooo_ ,” Link whispered.

“Sorry,” Rhett smiled sheepishly at Link’s pained expression.

“Taxi?” He looked hopeful.

“It isn't that far.”

“ _I can’t b’lieve this,_ ” he punched Rhett in the arm weakly.

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“RhettMcLaughlin … You‘re the w’rst guy … I have _ever_ met.” He stumbled forward and lost his footing.

“Woah, there!” Rhett caught him before he could fall, slipping an arm around his waist.

Suddenly they were very close, Link’s face only inches from his own.

He held his breath.

And then Link leaned in and kissed him.

Rhett’s eyes widened in shock, his heart immediately speeding up. And then he was kissing Link back. He tasted distinctly of alcohol and Rhett could smell the vaguely floral shampoo that he used. Link moaned softly into Rhett’s mouth; the kiss was insistent, almost urgent. His hands traveled up and knotted in the other man’s hair. It felt _right_.

Then a car drove past, bathing them in light. Link jumped back, yanked out of the moment, and broke them apart.

He stood there with his face flushed, searching Rhett’s face frantically for any sort of reaction, his breathing harsh and pupils blown wide.

Rhett’s mouth opened and closed. He didn’t know what to say. This moment had played out so many times in his head, and yet here it was, finally happening and nothing like he thought it would be; transpiring days before Link’s wedding, neither of them sober enough to understand the situation fully. He was brought back to reality by Link apologising profusely. He looked visibly shaken.

“I’m- Rhett, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Id’n’know what that was.”

“It’s okay, man-” Rhett reached to touch Link on the shoulder but he pulled back.

“ _No!_ Is’not.” He cleared his throat. “It’s not. I was stupid. ‘m not like that.”

Like _that_.

Rhett’s heart sank.

He knew exactly what that meant.

Link’s breathing quickened, his eyes screwed shut. “Please b’lieve me I’m not like that I wouldn’t do something like that _I’m not the kind of person who would-_ ”

“Link, buddy, you’re okay.” Rhett took him by the wrists. “I’m alright. It’s alright.”

“It didn’tmean _anything_ ,” he gasped.

Rhett knew he shouldn’t press it any further, it hurt him to see Link in so much distress, but he had to know. “Then why did you … ?”

Link shook his head quickly, listing to one side. “I don’t know. _I don’t know._ ”

“Are you feeling okay?”

“I feel … Idon’t know what I‘m feeling. I had to _do_ something.” He swayed slightly and then said, barely loud enough for Rhett to hear, “What if I’m making the wrong decision?”

Rhett froze, years worth of pent up thoughts and emotions threatening to spill. It would be so easy to just tell Link how he felt - but instead, “Trust me, you’re not.”

Link looked at the ground, “I don’t think ‘m ready to get married.”

“Link,” Rhett placed his hands on his shoulders. “We’ve been best friends since first grade. I know you better than anyone else, so believe me when I say that you are going to be absolutely fine.”

He looked like he was struggling with himself.  “I mean- you’re not … When we, y’know,” he waved his arm about vaguely.

Rhett raised an eyebrow.

“You’re not …” Link worried his bottom lip. “You don’t ‘xactly seem concerned that I ...”

When he said that he knew Link well, Rhett wasn’t lying. He could guarantee that the next morning Link would pretend none of that night happened; claiming he was so blackout drunk he couldn’t remember a thing. It hurt to admit, but Link would never confess to having any sort of feelings for him sober.

Which was exactly why he couldn’t tell Link what he truly thought. He was getting married. That was what he wanted. He loved Christy, and maybe it was true that a small part of him did feel something for Rhett - but that wasn’t the point. At least not today. Right now he just wanted Link to be happy. Everything else could follow.

He shrugged as nonchalantly as possible. “It’s not like it meant anything.”

Link nodded, reassuring himself. “It didn’t.”

Rhett looked at his feet.

“Let’s just n’ver speakof this again, okay?” Link wrung out his hands.

“Fine by me.”

They walked the rest of the way home in silence, Link occasionally stumbling and leaning against Rhett for support. He wasn’t paying attention, though. His eyes were trained on the sky as his mind wandered.

Someday everything was going to fix itself.

They would find a way.

He was sure of it.

  
  
  


**_Present day - June 3rd, 2015_ **

When Rhett finally crossed the border into North Carolina it was late in the afternoon, a day since Link disappeared. A mist of rain hung over Buie’s Creek, but the air was still thick and humid.

He drove through the town mechanically. Past the houses of his relatives and old friends, past Link’s old house, past the cemetery and the dilapidated remaining foundations of the water tower, past Hornet Central High. It felt like he was floating above it all.

_What was he going to tell Link when he arrived? What were they going to do about their families?_ Rhett would admit that he was the more clear-headed of the two of them, but Link wasn’t one to just drop _everything_. It concerned him. Not enough to cause him anxiety, however. It wouldn’t matter in the end. When he found Link they could figure everything out; make some sort of agreement.

He pulled to a stop next to woods. As the car ticked, Rhett sat listening to the hiss of the rain. His heart beat rapidly in his chest. There were so many things he wanted to say that his thoughts were racing.

After taking a minute to collect himself, he climbed out of the car and locked it behind him, stepping into the underwood. As he trudged through the bush a feeling of unease settled over him, as if there was something terribly wrong with this entire situation that he was overlooking. He was unable to pinpoint its origin. It felt almost as if someone was watching him.

He pressed on, pushing his way through the trees and low-hanging branches. But when he stepped out into The Clearing something was immediately ... off. It looked different from last time he saw it. More empty.

Rhett looked around. First Left. Then right. The rain had increased to a steady downpour and his clothes were soaked through, sticking to his skin. The cold was a dull ache.

“Link?” he called out into the forest.

No response.

The wind whipped at Link’s jacket and he clutched it closer to himself.

“Link?” he called again, backing away and scanning the forest for any sign that he had been there before.

_“Hello?”_

Rhett’s head was spinning. _Where was he?_ There had to be some sort of mistake he’d made along the way. _Maybe he was just taking shelter from the storm? Maybe he was somewhere else in the forest?_

_Maybe he was just …_

He wanted to believe he would find Link there so much. He wanted to believe it more than anything else in the whole world.

But deep down, he knew.

Link wasn’t in The Clearing.

Link wasn’t even in North Carolina.

He never had been.

* * *

 

_Rhett’s phone was ringing. He ignored it, continuing to drive. It continued until it reached voicemail. Jessie was on the other end._

_“Rhett. Please just pick up. I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re going through and that’s why I gave you time yesterday, but the kids are getting worried and I’m-”_

_“Dad? Are you talking to Dad? Mom! Is that Dad on the phone?” The muffled voices of Shepherd and Locke could be heard in the background._

_“Rhett, please just come home.”_

_The call crackled to a stop._

* * *

 

Rhett fell to his knees.

“Please, Link. You can - you can come out now!” He began to laugh. “Everything is okay! We’re okay! We’re okay now, aren’t we?”

* * *

 

_“Eggs and bacon al dente,” Rhett grinned, sliding the plates onto the table. “Bon appetite.”_

_Locke pouted, “What does ‘al dente’ mean?”_

_“Rhett.” He spun around to see Jessie standing in the doorway._

_“‘Morning,” Rhett greeted, “I thought we agreed you could have a sleep-in today? I just cooked an amazing-” He stopped. There was a look on Jessie’s face that he’d never seen there before. “Is everything okay?”_

_“Daaaad,” Locke moaned, tugging at Rhett’s sleeve._

_“I got a call. From Christy.” Jessie took a deep breath. “Rhett, there’s been an accident.”_

* * *

 

“You’re okay now. Please just tell me you’re okay. That’s all I want to hear, Link.” Rhett squeezed his eyes shut. “You don’t need to tell me … You don’t need to tell me anything! You don’t need to tell me that you love me or that - that you even _like_ me. I don’t care anymore! _I don’t care!_ Please. _Please._ Just tell me you’re all right.”

* * *

 

_It wasn’t even fatal. Malpractice they said. A simple misunderstanding._

* * *

 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you. I’m sorry I was selfish. I’m _sorry_. Please don’t leave me alone. I need you.”

* * *

 

_He was never going to hear Link’s voice again, or see his lopsided smile, or hear his laugh._

* * *

 

They would never write another song together. Never release another video.

* * *

 

_There would be no more last-minute holidays. No more petty arguments._

* * *

 

No more small-talk. No more affectionate teasing.

* * *

 

_No more nostalgia._

* * *

 

Nothing.

  
  
  


**_2 days prior - May 31st, 2015_ **

Rhett watched as Link meticulously cleared away his desk and went to rinse his coffee cup out. His hair and clothing were disheveled and there was still coloured sharpie on his face from filming the latest episode of GMM. As he leaned over the sink and rolled up his sleeves, his gaze raised to meet Rhett’s.

“You look ridiculous.”

Rhett laughed, “You do as well.”

“I can’t believe this is what we do for a living …” Link shook his head and held his cup under the running water.

“You’ve been saying that a lot lately. ‘You got short-term memory loss or something? Not a good sign.”

Link snorted and placed the cup back onto his desk. He scrubbed at his face with his hand. “I am never getting this stuff off.”

Rhett’s eyebrows furrowed, scrutinising. “It’s not _that_ bad. Except for, y’know, this whole part,” he gestured towards Link’s face.

“You’re a jerk.”

Rhett grinned.

Link pulled his glasses off started to polish them on his sleeve.

“Y’know … In today’s Wheel of Mythicality I could’ve sworn you were going to kiss me,” Rhett mentioned casually, fidgeting with his ring.

Link laughed, taken aback. “What?”

“You were so close to my face! For a second you had me worried there. I don’t know.”

“Dude, no,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “That’s just … _weird_.”

“So you didn’t, I dunno, think about it?”

“Rhett.”

“What?” He looked away, not wanting to meet Link’s gaze.

“Don’t do this.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Link folded his arms.

They stood in awkward silence for several more minutes before Rhett finally caved.

“You … I don’t know why you’re getting so uptight about this! You’ve kissed me _before_.”

Link closed his eyes and took a calming breath. “Rhett …”

“ _No_ ,” he continued, now gaining momentum, “You _obviously_ have feelings for me so I don’t know what’s so wrong with-”

“It’s not - that - simple,” Link hissed. “Even if I did it’s not like I’d be able to _do_ anything about it!”

“So you admit it.”

“I don’t want to continue having this conversation,” Link turned away from him, gathering his laptop and binder and reaching for his jacket.

“If we’re not going to talk about this now, then when?”

Link stopped and spun around to glare at Rhett. “You really want to know what _I_ think? You want _my_ opinion?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“After all this time I still feel like you still don’t see _me_. It’s like you have this idea inside your head of who I’m supposed to be and who you’re supposed to be and - The thing I don’t understand is - I … I’m not that, alright?” Link looked up at Rhett hopelessly. “I’m not just someone for you to just project a persona onto!”

Rhett’s breath caught in his chest. This wasn’t how things were supposed to be. There were no fireworks, no sudden realisations. There wasn’t that sense of completeness that he felt so long ago, as he lay under the stars; as he kissed Link outside that bar.

“I don’t know what you think I am, but I just _can’t_. I can’t be that for you! _This_ is who I am. Christy, and the kids, and … ” Link gestured around himself. “All of this! Can’t you be happy with what’s right here in front of you?”

“Link,” Rhett began.

“No. Please, don’t. I can’t- _I don’t_ want to hear it.”

“Well, if you’re so easily swayed by what I have to tell you then obviously you’re not as confident in your relationship with Christy as y-”

Link let out a high-pitched false laugh. “Listen to what you’re saying!"

Rhett was at a loss for words. He knew he was being childish. "I'm sorry," he said lamely.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" Link growled, blinking away angry tears. "If you cared about me at all you wouldn't be putting me in this _fucking_ situation!"

Rhett felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. Everything Link was saying was true and he hated himself for it.

He grit his teeth. "Well … maybe if you weren't so emotionally stunted I wouldn't have to!"

_“Emotionally … ?”_ Link’s expression became stony. “Y’know what? Get over yourself, Rhett.”

He turned, deftly picked up his things and left.

The studio door slammed behind him.

The lights flickered out.

And Rhett was alone.

  
  
  


**_Present day - June 4th, 2015_ **

Soon the rain began to slow and Rhett lay numb, staring up at the overcast sky as light filtered down in bands through gaps in the clouds.

All his life he'd been building up to somehow being with Link, despite their circumstances, but for the first time, he realised that maybe he was too late. He'd been so caught up in the possibility of what they could be that whatever chance they had at being together was already gone. It had been for some time.

Link had always been there. Wholly there.

But Rhett … he had treated every moment with Link like an unanswered question - something to be resolved, the pregnant pause before response, and in doing so took all they had for granted.

Now Link was gone. His life strictly confined within the limited days he occupied.

However, in Rhett’s memory Link was infinite; every possible person he was and could have been.

Which was why he had to let go.

The Link he was looking for was gone long before he went looking; he had been chasing an unattainable ideal. If only he hadn’t been so focused on himself, if only he remembered the reason he loved Link in the first place, if only he could have really _seen_ Link for who he was, instead of letting this fantastic idea he had of him erode all the time they spent together … Maybe he could have prevented all of this.

_If only he could ..._

This was the clause of Rhett McLaughlin’s past. A key part of his identity. It defined him.

And on June 3rd, 2015, he abandoned it.

No systematising, no dreaming.

Nothing.

It was all gone.

 

 


End file.
